Monthly Archives: April 2018

How do you talk with loved ones about diabetes?

April 11, 2018 – 10:11 am

Relationships. We’ve all got ’em, of one kind or another. Parent-child, siblings, significant others, Friends, Romans, Countrymen. And when it comes to diabetes, communicating with the ones closest to us is not as straightforward as it may seem on the surface.

Let me ask you: Have you ever held something back from a loved one, or if your loved one lives with diabetes, have they ever held something back from you? Maybe what was conveyed was not the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Maybe a detail was left out here or there.

Hey, you’re not alone. I’ve done it too, for differing reasons. I’ve left out details of a really bad low I had when I was traveling by myself. If my blood sugar was 65 mg/dL before lunch, maybe I said it was 95 mg/dL, even though the 95 was actually an hour and a half ago.

You might not know this, but that’s really hard for me to do. I tend to overshare, especially about my diabetes. The fact that I’ve not shared everything is a sign that I’ve taught myself to when to share and when not to share with the one person I should be willing to share anything with.

Excuse me while I pause for a moment of guilty reflection…

I worry sometimes that this means I’ve given up on getting The Great Spousal Unit to understand certain aspects of my diabetes. I’m sure there’s also an element of “I don’t want to worry her too much”, but let’s focus on the understanding right now because I want to ask:

How do you do it?

How do you decide what is worth sharing, what should be kept to yourself, what is important for your loved ones to know and not to know?

Do you ever get burned out talking about another high or low, another bad pump site, another failed CGM sensor?

What’s the dividing line between Tell and Don’t Tell?

Sure, if it’s important for Maureen to know so she can act on my behalf when I can’t speak for myself, I have to tell her. If it’s something that happened and she’s no worse off for not knowing about it, it’s probably okay to keep it to myself.

But there’s a lot of gray area in between there. And I’ve been doing a lot of personal examination lately to try and determine if I need to revamp my communication strategy with those closest to me.

It’s easy to get complacent when it comes to sharing, what we share, and how we share it. It’s easy to believe we’re sharing exactly the right amount at the right time, with the right person. But every once in a while, it’s okay to do some self-examination and reconsider how we’re talking to the people who mean the most to us.

We’re going to be covering this very topic tonight at 9:00 ET(US) during the weekly DSMA Twitter Chat. If you’d like to talk about it, follow the @DiabetesSocMed Twitter account and look for and use the #DSMA hashtag.

Join us, and let’s get a handle on this communication thing.

By StephenS | Posted in Social Media | Tagged , , | Comments (1)

Another Blogabirthday.

April 9, 2018 – 10:11 am

Today, Happy Medium turns 6. Today, I turn 56 years old. And yes, even though I’m not close to retirement, I’m at least doing the math.

Another Blogabirthday is here.

The 788 blog posts I’ve shared, including this one, have meant so much. This website has given me an extended chance to speak about subjects that have been very important to me.

Okay, there have been recipes and vacation recollections I’ve shared too, but I keep coming back to the main purpose of this blog: To connect, to share my thoughts, to serve as a platform for learning and sharing what I’ve learned. Also, to serve as a personal journal of sorts, so people reading this after I’m gone can see what it was like living with diabetes in the mid 20-teens.

It can’t all be seriousness and clinical thinking though. If that’s what this was about, I think I would have lost my inspiration for it a long time ago. While posts have been a little less frequent in the past year, they’ve still been regular, and that brings me to this thought:

I really, really like writing here. If you write a blog too, you might have a sense of this, but if you don’t, I don’t know if there’s a way to describe how blissful I feel every time I sit down to write something. It never seems like a chore.

This is one of the only places in my life (maybe the only place in my life) where no one can tell me what to say or how to say it. Every time I think about that, I almost get chills thinking of how absolutely free that makes me feel.

There are still many of us writing out our thoughts, educating others, and chronicling our lives online. I’m not unique. I think if you were to ask all of us for a memorable moment from blogging or other social media activism, my guess is we’d all recall something that had a direct impact on the life of one individual.

Readership at Happy Medium has gone up and down and up again over the years. I don’t pay too much attention to the stats. What I pay attention to is when I can express something that makes someone feel better, either physically or emotionally. That makes me want to come back to the keyboard and do the same for someone else, because no one should have to feel like they’re alone living with diabetes.

It’s as true as when I wrote this almost five years ago:

“If you’re only reaching one person, that one person is the most important person in the world… Your story is the most important one in the world to the person moved by it. Don’t let down the one person who needs to hear you.”

Whether you make that connection online or off, this is what makes the Diabetes Community special. Share your story. Use your freedom. Never take it for granted.

By StephenS | Posted in Milestones | Tagged , , , | Comments (2)

The Facebook Group phenomenon.

April 5, 2018 – 10:11 am

I’ve been added to about seven different Facebook groups lately (no, wait– it’s actually eight). All are diabetes or health care advocacy related. Is it me, or is this becoming a thing?

Sometimes, it’s because I’m attending or have attended a conference, and the organizers created a FB group for it. Others have been due to something common that the group’s creator wants to share and have shared within their group.

When I’m added to a group, I get a little imposter syndrome, like I do with nearly everything else. Why do they want me in their group? But I get over it kinda quickly. Then I’m left with: do I participate, lurk, or ignore it altogether?

I’m a Facebook user and have been for years, but I think it’s safe to say that I consume a lot more content than I produce. So already, I’m mostly on the lurking side.

Not that I’m shy online. But I’m careful about my online (and offline) reputation, and that makes me careful about saturating the internet with things that I might be embarrassed about sharing in years to come. So I err on the side of caution.

Plus, I look at FB groups with the same lens as I look at individual FB users… all of them are different. They have different focuses, and they appeal to different constituencies. Nothing wrong with that. I see that as something that makes the overall Facebook community better.

But when I consider posting to a FB group, I take into account the things that make that group unique. And with so many different groups covering so many different topics, I feel like posting to each one would mean I’d have to turn on a different personality each time I post to another group’s feed. That’s a lot of work for something that’s supposed to be fun. I just want to be me… be authentic.

I also have to manage my settings, every time I’m added to a group. Do I want notifications? Which notifications? Do I want to add the group as a favorite? Do I want to leave the group entirely? That’s extra work too.

I like being a part of these groups. I want to hear what people have to say about a topic. Sometimes I learn something new. It’s always worth hearing another perspective on something that I have in common with the users in these groups. Once in a while, I have something important to say too.

However, I have a high regard for people, individual people that I can have a one-on-one connection with. And when half of my personal FB feed contains posts from users, and half are from groups, I don’t think it’s hyperbole to say that the Facebook Group phenomenon has reached its zenith (a zenith is a peak– really, I just wanted to use the words hyperbole and zenith in the same sentence). Or I need some new Facebook friends. Recommendations are welcome.

Nevertheless, keep creating those Facebook groups, people. It may not seem like I’m there all the time, but I’ll be reading. Good luck.

By StephenS | Posted in Social Media | Tagged , , | Comments (1)

8 Questions.

April 3, 2018 – 10:11 am

You know, sometimes things roll around in your head and you just need to get them out so you can let them go. Like these eight questions:

1. Have you ever used your BG readouts to choose lottery numbers? Just me? Here’s the game:

Let the Powerball or Mega Millions jackpots get really high. Then take your BG number from either your CGM or your glucose meter throughout the day and play those numbers. Of course, you have to use just two digits, so if the number is 123 or 223, you play 23. If the number is 84 (the jackpot numbers only go up to about 60), you switch it so you play the number 48.

I’ve never won the lottery with this scheme, but if I did, wouldn’t that make a terrific story?

2. Does anyone ever think that a president who would fire his Secretary of State via tweet would actually care about anyone living with a chronic condition?

Ever?

3. Would you rather have a CGM sensor that you can stop and restart for weeks, or one that requires exactly zero fingerstick calibrations for only ten days? I think we’re going to find out the answer to that throughout the rest of 2018. At any rate, this is the way of the future, so love it or leave it, this seems to be the way we’re going.

4. After hearing the recent news about Facebook not only selling user profile information, but also the ability to access mobile device data without our consent (and don’t try to shame me for this practice by reminding me that I agreed to the terms of service when I created my account around a decade ago)… are you more reluctant to upload all your device data somewhere?

If I were going to run for president, or the senate, or if I would be up for a cabinet post, maybe. But I think my diabetes device data is pretty low on the official russian operative priority list.

5. What’s your next big focus in diabetes advocacy? Is it insulin affordability? Is it learning more about the FDA drug approval process, or finding out about the tricks pharmacy benefit managers play with formularies? There are still many avenues of diabetes advocacy we can pursue, and one amazing place to find out and take action on them all.

If you live in the USA, go to diabetespac.org and download the DPAC app. Use it to join the chorus of caring patients, caregivers, and other Americans who are taking action on these and even more issues in quick, easy steps that will have you feeling great about advocacy without spending every waking hour wondering how you’re going to squeeze it into your schedule. And one of the best things about DPAC is that they’re totally non-partisan. There’s room for everybody.

Use the easy button. Get the DPAC app.

6. If I donate to a JDRF or ADA ride or walk for someone else, but don’t actually participate in any of them myself, am I a bad supporter of those causes?

I happily donate to others’ JDRF or ADA fundraisers. But I’ve never ridden in a JDRF ride. After doing a few ADA rides and paying all or nearly all of the minimum contribution needed to participate each time, I’ve given up on those too. I’m sure they’re still wonderful happenings, and I still have the energy to do them. But at this point, the price of admission is just too high. Right now, I’m okay with helping four or five people reach their goal of participating, instead of helping only myself. Is that wrong?

7. Is lack of appetite a sign of old age? I’m just not the foodie that I once was. I eat far less today than I’ve ever eaten as an adult. If I could eat anything right now… I don’t think I could choose anything. For the most part, I’m just eating for sustenance. I’m not losing any weight, but I’m certainly eating less.

I’m exercising more too, if that matters. But I’ve always been active anyway.

Finally…

8. What should I do on my birthday? It’s next week. It’s not a milestone birthday, so I’ll probably just go to work and come home and be grateful I can still go to work and come home.

I think winter has lasted far too long around here.
 
 
Great… now that I have that out of my head, I can go play those lottery numbers. What have you been thinking about lately?

By StephenS | Posted in Out Of the Box | Tagged , , | Comments (3)