How do you talk with loved ones about diabetes?

Relationships. We’ve all got ’em, of one kind or another. Parent-child, siblings, significant others, Friends, Romans, Countrymen. And when it comes to diabetes, communicating with the ones closest to us is not as straightforward as it may seem on the surface.

Let me ask you: Have you ever held something back from a loved one, or if your loved one lives with diabetes, have they ever held something back from you? Maybe what was conveyed was not the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Maybe a detail was left out here or there.

Hey, you’re not alone. I’ve done it too, for differing reasons. I’ve left out details of a really bad low I had when I was traveling by myself. If my blood sugar was 65 mg/dL before lunch, maybe I said it was 95 mg/dL, even though the 95 was actually an hour and a half ago.

You might not know this, but that’s really hard for me to do. I tend to overshare, especially about my diabetes. The fact that I’ve not shared everything is a sign that I’ve taught myself to when to share and when not to share with the one person I should be willing to share anything with.

Excuse me while I pause for a moment of guilty reflection…

I worry sometimes that this means I’ve given up on getting The Great Spousal Unit to understand certain aspects of my diabetes. I’m sure there’s also an element of “I don’t want to worry her too much”, but let’s focus on the understanding right now because I want to ask:

How do you do it?

How do you decide what is worth sharing, what should be kept to yourself, what is important for your loved ones to know and not to know?

Do you ever get burned out talking about another high or low, another bad pump site, another failed CGM sensor?

What’s the dividing line between Tell and Don’t Tell?

Sure, if it’s important for Maureen to know so she can act on my behalf when I can’t speak for myself, I have to tell her. If it’s something that happened and she’s no worse off for not knowing about it, it’s probably okay to keep it to myself.

But there’s a lot of gray area in between there. And I’ve been doing a lot of personal examination lately to try and determine if I need to revamp my communication strategy with those closest to me.

It’s easy to get complacent when it comes to sharing, what we share, and how we share it. It’s easy to believe we’re sharing exactly the right amount at the right time, with the right person. But every once in a while, it’s okay to do some self-examination and reconsider how we’re talking to the people who mean the most to us.

We’re going to be covering this very topic tonight at 9:00 ET(US) during the weekly DSMA Twitter Chat. If you’d like to talk about it, follow the @DiabetesSocMed Twitter account and look for and use the #DSMA hashtag.

Join us, and let’s get a handle on this communication thing.

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Comments

  • Rick Phillips  On April 11, 2018 at 9:21 pm

    Stephen, sorry I missed DSMA. It looks like a good chat. How do I talk to relatives about diabetes? I just do. I never offer advice and never take any. When someone says have you tired x? I say no, kale water does not work, even if it is vitamin infused. No I have not tried garlic, or cinnamon, I have more sense. I usually know something about them and if I want to play along I might say something like of course I have, I nearly died, I was in a coma for 22 days. LOL

    Liked by 1 person

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