This is the one about lows.

Went to work on the fence after breakfast yesterday.  Joining me after a while was a 16 year old neighbor (kids will do almost anything when there’s money to be made… and that’s the way it should be).  Nearby were The Great Spousal Unit and The Live-In Niece, who were doing yard work.  Just before noon, Maureen went to run a few errands.

Now, I made sure to under-, not over-bolus at breakfast, knowing that I would be working hard on an 80 degree day.  But the life of someone with type 1 is full of times when the best laid plans are messed up by an uncooperative pancreas, metabolism, pump, (choose your word here).  At about 12:00, I started to get that feeling.  Nothing felt right.  I had to reposition myself multiple times to try to complete even the simplest of tasks.  And before I knew it, 5 minutes to wire a section of fence to a post became 15 minutes.  By now, the 16 year old is looking at me like I’m a 95 year old who can’t get it together, and I’m thinking, “If I can just finish this task, we can break for lunch”.

That’s when Rachel happened by and asked, “It’s a little past noon, are you guys gonna get some lunch?”.  And I gave her that look.  The one that says I’m too proud to ask, but can you please help me?  The one that completely freaks her out.
“Uncle Stephen, do you need me to get you some juice?”  I said no, we’ll be finished here soon, and we can have some lunch, but she didn’t hear me.  Because she was getting juice.  And before I knew it, she was back and I was drinking it.  Crisis averted.

What I hate isn’t going low.  It’s the fact that your mind checks out at the very time the rest of your body is screaming for help.  Then there’s the whole macho guy thing, where I know I’m getting worse, but I can suck it up and get through this, then medicate. And I don’t like relying on anyone else to come to my rescue.

This is how most of my lows are, when the bg is lower than 65 or so.  Not horrible, but not without some danger.  I’ve been working on it.  I know that I can’t always see the lows coming… no one can do that.  But I have a set of procedures so to speak, something that will (hopefully) be instinctive in these situations, even if my brain is already taking a break.  It works, most of the time.  But yesterday, because of the heat, because I was already sweating, because I didn’t stop working immediately, because I couldn’t remember all of the steps I had worked out in my head, because, because, because, I will still keep working on it.

Perfection isn’t possible… but improvement is always worth the effort.


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