Diabetes Blog – Happy-Medium.net

Here’s something you probably know, or maybe you should remember if you forgot. Because we see, we read about people all the time who seem to be better at handling their diabetes than we are. They’re in magazines, with big glossy photos, and stories recounting all of the fabulous things they’ve accomplished while living with this condition.

But there’s something not written in there. It’s something that you and I and those “Diabetes Superstars of 2019” have in common, in addition to our failed pancreases.

Trust me when I say this: absolutely no one is living a perfect life with diabetes.

We all have a weakness. Whether it’s the late night carbs we squirrel away when no one’s looking, or it’s burnout that shows up when we least expect it, or it’s an A1c we’re uncomfortable with, everyone has something they would not like to show the public.

I’m no exception. My weaknesses include extra carbs when traveling, probably due to stress and a fear of going low at night. I don’t experience depression, but I have my moments of melancholy now and then. And there’s one other thing.

I have to be the lousiest refiller of prescriptions and supplies in the history of the planet.

I sit here this morning, looking at the cabinets where I store my pump infusion sets, reservoirs, and CGM sensors, and I realize that the sensors are the only thing I have enough of right now. The infusion sets and reservoirs will run out within two weeks if I don’t refill them. And I feel stupid.

I feel stupid because Medtronic will stop supplying the infusion sets and reservoirs for my Animas Vibe pump in September. That means, when the supplies run out after that, I need a new pump, or I need to stop pumping altogether.

I’ve been good at stretching supplies… wearing infusion sets a day or two longer, reusing reservoirs, all with the idea that I could build up a good supply and go a few more months, maybe into 2020, before having to start on a new pump.

Now, with my current supplies running out, I have to start over, and if I’m lucky, I’ll get an extra few weeks beyond September before switching. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t mad at myself right now.

Now, I could get mad at Medtronic, because they don’t have to stop supplying me in September. But even if Animas still had a presence in the market, they would eventually stop supplying my pump, so the onus is really on me with this one.

So what can I do? I can be mad at myself, but I also must go forward, recognize that I have to get my supplies refilled, and do that. Today. Maybe I can set a reminder to refill my supplies every three months, though I suspect my delay with this part of my diabetes is really just that I hate to go through the motions of ordering supplies on a regular basis.

There you have it. I’m not perfect. I’m never going to be in a magazine either, but you get my drift, right? Don’t ever look at someone and think they have every part of their diabetes figured out. We all have something we wish we were doing better. But we also have resilience, and that keeps us doing what we need to do, even if sometimes, we don’t want to do it.

Note: I did order reservoirs and infusion sets today… maybe I needed to get this out of my head and just do it.